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Photo Source: TMZ

Have you seen Star Magazine’s exclusive with Nadia Suleman highlighting her body 1 year after giving birth to Octuplets? She claims that she hasn’t had any plastic surgery. Oh please! Do you hear that sound? It’s the collective LOL from all mom’s everywhere. You can see the stretch marks in the photo where she is pregnant, and then miraculously they are gone in the Star Magazine photo spread. Absolutely ridiculous and physically impossible. Stretch marks fade but they don’t fade that quickly and they never totally disappear (I have some faint ones on my hips from puberty still). Also, where is all the excess skin? At the very least we have another case of photoshopping off the baby weight but I’m thinking there is also some tummy tuck action going on here. I just don’t think it’s possible to bounce back like that after only 12 months, especially considering how large her belly was – look at that photo!

I personally have nothing against plastic surgery (in moderation) and I do think she looks really fabulous for what her body has been through, but why not just admit that the photo is doctored and/or you’ve had plastic surgery? I told my husband that I would want surgery if, when we were done having kids, my boobs were at my waist and my waist was at my hips. Fortunately, that doesn’t seem to be the case…yet. But if it was, I’d admit to it.

Now, busy and/or frazzled moms can take heart. Those tragic non-outfits we throw on and hair that goes unbrushed just so we can get out the door somewhat on time is now considered high-fashion and Bloomingdale’s runway worthy. Nicole Richie recently debuted her Winter Kate Spring Collection and her choice of outfit to introduce the line was…unfortunate. Proof that anyone can be considered a “fashionista”! Well, I guess I’ll stop here…because, you know, if you can’t say anything nice…

Recently post-baby body reveals have become a staple of the weekly gossip mags. Fact is, these stories sell, but most of them are fraudulent. Take for instance OK Magazine’s cover of Kourtney Kardashian. Total bull. Even Kardashian herself slammed the mag for their photoshopping. So ladies who have just had a baby, take heart. If you are 3 months post-baby and still haven’t lost the baby weight, you are totally normal! It’s frustrating for sure. In fact it sucks. I want to fit into my clothes and look good in them again! We just have to remember that it took 9 months to grow the body out, so let’s cut ourselves some slack and give ourselves some time to get back to where we were. I guess I only have 8 months then, since Madam Poopsalot was a month premature. Oh crap! Better do some sit ups now.

“It wasn’t painful. Not even a little bit.”

This is how Brazilian supermodel Gisele Bundchen described her recent labor with son, Benjamin (Daddy is Footballer Tom Brady). Having birthed two children, this is something that I can’t even conceive of. I do believe that labor is different for every woman and even within the same woman. With my first baby, the labor was intense. It felt like a jackhammer was pounding on my pelvis from the inside. Literally. It was the most pain I have ever been in. The nurse said the contractions were off the monitor and they were one right after another. I got the epidural at 8 cm dilation. I felt much better after that. The labor with my second baby was much easier. Granted, I got the epidural at 3 cm after hours of pitocin and walking around wasn’t doing much. The doctor wanted to crank the pitocin way up so she suggested an epidural as she felt it would relax me and help me progress faster (I was on a time crunch due to my water breaking and I was terrified I would end up with a c-section if it went to 24 hours). Point is, that pitocin is supposed to make contractions really painful but in my experience the labor with my son was way worse. So, I think every labor is different even within the same woman. My contractions even felt very different with each of my children: my son was jackhammer-like pain in my pelvis and in my bones and my daughter was strong period cramps and pain across my belly and down my thighs and back. Very different.

So, why am I writing about this? Well, her comments kind of annoyed me, so I felt compelled. I’m happy for her and all but I have a really hard time believing her. Sure, maybe she was lucky and it wasn’t intensely painful but I highly doubt it wasn’t painful AT ALL! Maybe she has a permanently numb vagina. All that waxing maybe?