Straight Lines
October 21st, 2005
There was a post on Fark today involving scantily clad pictures of Gisele Bundchen. I’ve never been a big fan of her, for several reasons:
1) She looks like a 12 year old boy
2) Catch her from the right angle, she’s got a horseface
3) She’s dating Leonardo DiCrapio
But really, I think farker Quantum Apostrophe said it best:
“No hips. If I put on a bikini, I’d look the same. Why would I want a woman that looks like me? Straight lines are only good in geometry class.”
Seriously, what’s with men who like women without curves? I’ve had friends in the past who were into women like this, and frankly in some of them I’ve suspected latent homosexuality. Now I’m not saying I get down for chubby girls, but how about something besides your breast implants to remind me that you’re a woman?
Clark always said that waist:hip ratio was a solid measure for defining attractiveness in a woman, and I have to agree. The wikipedia entry on the matter specifies an optimal waist:hip ratio of about 0.7. This isn’t too far off from my own supposed ideal of 0.67, derived from the Playboy standard of 36-24-36.
Gisele, by my extremely scientific methods, clocks in at a boyish 0.8 (let’s approximate the body circumference as an ellipse where the long axis is twice the length of the short axis, with the circumference approximated by this method). Monica Belluci on the other hand comes in at a sexy 0.64. Now we’re talking!
(Note: If you do a Google search for “gisele bundchen measurements” you come up with numbers like 34-24-34, implying a ratio of 0.71 - I call bullshit!)
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